Chapter 19 – Empathy to Enhance Negotiation from the A Practical EmPath: Rewire Your Mind book by Scott Howard Swain.
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“Deep Dive” on Chapter 19 – Empathy to enhance negotiation from the A Practical EmPath: Rewire Your Mind book by Scott Howard Swain
In negotiation, empathy is not a weakness, but a strategic advantage.
While having worked in various professions, Scott first gained insight into negotiation at age 20, when working for a short time selling cars for Nissan.
Short version of a practice I was taught there: “Any time you make an offer or counter-offer to a customer, you say it, then shut up. The next person who speaks … loses.”
Though we could poke some holes in that methodology, we can also look at the wisdom it teaches. Namely, we want to convey and image of finality without fully committing to finality or ultimatum.
What if we convey our offer, the customer begins thinking on it, and we start to worry or get impatient, and we say, “What do you think?” “What do you say?” “Do you like that?” “Can you afford that?” or, really, saying anything, then yes, we have reduced our power in the negotiation.
Or worse, if we say, “… but we may have wiggle room,” we definitely lose.
What is another benefit from waiting besides conveying some non-committal finality?
We are showing patience, consideration, and respect for their pace.
Limitations of ultimatums.
Another lesson I learned at Nissan was to offer choices instead of ultimatums. Ultimatums coincide with black & white thinking, where choices offer more possibilities. In the car sales world an ultimatum might look like:
“The price is $50,000. Take it or leave it.”
What we were trained to offer:
“Based on the car’s price, your credit, and the interest rate, we have some choices for you. If you go with a 60-month loan, your investment would be $600 per month. If you want to pay it off sooner, we can get you a 48-month loan…”
See how we shift the negotiation away from a yes / no proposition toward a more open field of choices?
Now, let’s learn some more powerful ways to empower our powers of negotiation to increase our personal power with others!
Get the book: https://amazon.com/dp/B0CQMG6MVM
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