The increase in unhealthy eating, sedentary lifestyles, various drugs, public education, and a certain kind of parenting have contributed to a steep increase in obesity (including children!), diabetes, cancer, and other ailments, including emotional fragility.
The popularization of low fat and high carb diets, along with mineral-depleted soils, corn-fed animals, vegetable oils, and refined “foods” is something I personally experienced, which resulted in Type 2 diabetes with a blood glucose level of 15.5, which is off the charts bad. Two years of keto and my A1C dropped to 5.7. That is somewhere between pre-diabetic and normal. All the many ailments caused by my inactivity and bad diet have disappeared.
In case you don’t know what diabetes can do to a person, I had all the following issues:
– Worsening vision to the point where sometimes I couldn’t read a computer screen to work.
– Muscle deterioration.
– Low testosterone. Low sex drive, low energy levels, and less drive. Also, I’m not gay but women would often ask me if I was. Ever heard the term “sissy” or “soyboy”. That is what I became to some degree.
– Nerve damage, pain, and numbness. I got to where I needed to drug myself to be able to sleep. Erectile dysfunction. Near constant muscle pain. Couldn’t walk far without debilitating knee pain. Certainly couldn’t attend or teach Kung Fu classes.
– And more but I don’t want to horrify you. I think you get the point.
I’ll say it again and share the “how”: All those issues are 100% gone! How?
– Went cold turkey on carbs. High fat, medium protein, low carbs. Keto. Also, quite a bit of “One Meal a Day” (OMAD).
– *Built up a habit* of exercising every day. Started out with short walks, progressed to short to medium bike rides, then longer and more frequent bike rides combined with weight lifting. And now I’ve added one day a week of medium martial arts training that I intend to increase to be harder and eventually seven days a week.
By the way, the inflammation-lessening results of a low carb diet are *fast*! On day four into that diet, I went out dancing and danced for 1.5 hours without pain! Oh and not only is my testosterone level on the med/high end for my age, but I have all the benefits that accompany that important hormone. I am 53 years old, by the way.
A last word about testosterone: The average male, same age, has 60% of the testosterone as that same male in 1980. A 40% drop in just over 40 years. I look around and I see the effects of this in too many people.
Some 2022 reports claim over 40% of Americans are now overweight or obese. And this number is growing fast. What do you see when you look around?
There’s also a movement that, in the name of protecting the feelings of fat people, is working at removing the “stigma” of obesity being a health risk and even going so far as to promote obesity.
Did you think I’d be talking about weed, LSD, shrooms, or cocaine? Nope. That’s a whole other topic where I see pros and cons and especially pros in regard to a person’s liberty to do what they want to their own body. To be fair, I’d also like more people to know how destructive even the most prevalent and innocuous drugs like Marijuana can be. While MJ has proven physical and mental health benefits for some, I will point out that it can become a crutch for creativity, emotional stability, and other issues, including brain fog, memory, lessening of daily ambition.
Back on track with the drugs I’m most worried about. I’m talking the ones deemed “good” because they are approved by the [corrupt] FDA. We’ve heard the stories. We may have even played a part as a doctor, parent, or child.
“Your kid can’t keep still or pay attention? Here’s a prescription for meta-amphetamine- I mean- Ritalin, Adderall, Dexedrine, Focalin, etc.”
My dad in his later years (late 40’s) set up a lab in the desert and promptly became addicted to crystal meth. Have you been or been around someone who has? Not fun for either person. But the issue is far greater than being about “fun to be or be around”. He had the attention span and patience of a gnat. He was quick to anger. He required constant stimulation. One way to describe him was that he became far more emotionally fragile. Do those behaviours sound familiar?
Many have heard of “helicopter parenting,” which means a parenting style where the parent is near ever-present, watching, fixing, critiquing, and directing. A newer term, “bulldozer parenting,” takes it one step further where the parent removes all obstacles from the child’s path. This all comes out of love and genuine fear for the child’s well being. Unfortunately, “well being” now more often than not includes the emotional.
How can it be unfortunate to want to protect your child from trauma? Let’s distinguish between events that challenge a person to develop understanding, strength, resilience, self motivation, self soothing, and self reliance VS events that cause long term damage. So challenge and growth vs damage. I’m all for parents protecting their children from damage!
But what happens when you protect your child from boredom, for example? They look outside themselves for ways to alleviate the boredom because they are so used to their parents handing them the distractions they crave.
How about reassurance? Like many other practices that come from a place of love, this can be destructive. “It will be okay. Stop crying. Calm down. Knock it off. You’re fine. There’s nothing wrong with you. Be quiet. Shut your mouth and do what I told you to do. You’ll get over it.” Or distractions like “Look at this. Eat this. I’ll give you this. I’ll take you to Disney. If you are good, you can have a treat!” That said, my take on reassurance is to either hold back from giving it or, if I really feel it is important for this person to hear some reassurance, I ask their permission. “Hey that’s pretty intense what you have going on and I appreciate you sharing it with me. Did you want me to just listen or are you up for hearing some reassurance?” Same goes with advice, by the way.
Being mindful of my affects on others, I’d rather “condition” someone to make their own decisions than to be dependent on me. When working with impatient people, it can be a challenge for both parties when you hold back from giving them the instant solution they sometimes crave.
These are examples of common (and accepted by the majority/mainstream) ways people (parents, teachers, etc.) speak to children in our culture. Can you think of any worse way to teach our children to distrust their own feelings as well as increasing their fear of sharing their truths?
The subconscious mind interprets this treatment as, “My most loved and trusted person is showing me anger, fear, doubt, boredom, etc., are ugly and I should hide them and get over them quickly.”
What kind of adult do you think that protective attitude produces? You got it; the title of this article. Solutions? I’ve written extensively on this. Practical Empathy is what I call my favorite solution. Maybe I’m biased because of the many ways it has improved my life and the book with that title I’m writing right now. You can read many chapters for free here to find practical, down-to-earth, non-abusive, and responsibility-instilling practices you can use immediately with kids.
And yes, these practices are Universally as effective in all kinds of relationships, including even business! Want to really deal with the source of your anger? No, not with violence on the person you point at and blame but YOUR part. Want to become a better negotiator? Oh yeah! Want to have a sweet and loving relationship with a beautiful bottlenose dolphin? Me too! Shhh I’m joking! It’s really… uhm… a friend.
Read Practical Empathy for free: https://peakd.com/c/hive-180595
Other solutions, more physical in nature: https://peakd.com/empower/@scottermonkey/level-up-now-not-tomorrow
I publish chapters as I finish them.
To sum it all up, the factors I’ve outlined here are causing an epidemic of emotional fragility in both genders that are already causing problems that I think we can all see. That all said, I do believe there is hope. I’ll save that for you to guess at, talk about, and ask about.